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We publish experimental literature in print and online. We post stories and art here every day. Go to theNewerYork.com to find more weirdness.

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New Fiction: A Review of Chillin’ with You  by Britney Spears ft. Jamie Lynn Spears by Stephen O’Toole 

been thinking a lot about the song ‘CHILLIN’ WITH YOU’ by BRITNEY & JAMIE LYNN SPEARS recently.
like, how the song starts as this awful acoustic ballad, and then, without ever stopping being an awful acoustic ballad, it also grows spaceship sort of wheeee noises and a really clumsy EDM-ish build slash drop, so clumsily in fact, that it made me think a second song had started playing under it on my itunes, because britney (qua vocalist) doesn’t react to the change in any way, and carries on singing in her flattest ballad-y monotone…WHICH LEADS ME TO ASSUME, QUITE NATURALLY, that britney here is making some sort of comment on how, while trends in music come and go, she will never change–always slightly out of time but never 100% unfashionable, entirely manufactured AND YET STILL, seemingly, pursuing her own muse.
or, like, how, in the first verse’s pre-chorus, britney sings, ‘I drank some red wine/Now I’m walking on the sky’ but in the second verse’s pre-chorus, jamie lynn sings, ‘I drank some WHITE wine/Now I’m walking on the sky.’ is this intended to signify some apostolic, early christian ritual on britney’s part? is she, a la the last supper, drinking of our her lord’s blood to absolve herself of sin? and, if so, what significance that jamie lynn drinks WHITE? is this a reference to jamie lynn’s recent marriage? is britney warning her younger sibling about the perils and compromises of marriage, and painting herself as a red (scarlet) woman? is britney suggesting that the two sisters are each mirror images of the other or, IF YOU WILL, either end of the same hour glass (OF WINE). certainly, such a reading is in keeping with the contrast between britney’s ‘I loved so much that I cried’ and jamie lynn’s ‘I sang so loud that I smiled’, ABOUT WHICH I NEED SAY NO MORE.
or, like, how, due to the fact that this is a duet between sisters, we would ASSUME that the titular YOU refers, indexically, to each of them, AND YET, britney chooses to open the song with a triple invocation of the same, her blank tone, almost, i’ll say it, accusatory. could the YOU, in fact, BE YOU AND I (ALSO A YOU?) and as for ‘chillin’, well, i suppose that this could just be a reference to the white wine that jamie lynn imbibes throughout…perhaps we’re being instructed to be servants, slaves, (viz. I’M A SLAVE 4U???) to a new pop sensation…but what if, instead, britney is referring to her haters (me, us, YOU) THROWING SHADE ALL OVER HER. what if she, in fact, views her life now as nothing more than the process of navigating these shadows? CHILLIN’ stuff indeed. truly CHILLIN’ (like a villain????)
—————————————————————————————————–
Buy Chillin’ With You


Read it: http://theneweryork.com/review-chillin-britney-spears-ft-jamie-lynn-spears-stephen-otoole/

New Fiction: A Review of Chillin’ with You by Britney Spears ft. Jamie Lynn Spears by Stephen O’Toole

been thinking a lot about the song ‘CHILLIN’ WITH YOU’ by BRITNEY & JAMIE LYNN SPEARS recently.

like, how the song starts as this awful acoustic ballad, and then, without ever stopping being an awful acoustic ballad, it also grows spaceship sort of wheeee noises and a really clumsy EDM-ish build slash drop, so clumsily in fact, that it made me think a second song had started playing under it on my itunes, because britney (qua vocalist) doesn’t react to the change in any way, and carries on singing in her flattest ballad-y monotone…WHICH LEADS ME TO ASSUME, QUITE NATURALLY, that britney here is making some sort of comment on how, while trends in music come and go, she will never change–always slightly out of time but never 100% unfashionable, entirely manufactured AND YET STILL, seemingly, pursuing her own muse.

or, like, how, in the first verse’s pre-chorus, britney sings, ‘I drank some red wine/Now I’m walking on the sky’ but in the second verse’s pre-chorus, jamie lynn sings, ‘I drank some WHITE wine/Now I’m walking on the sky.’ is this intended to signify some apostolic, early christian ritual on britney’s part? is she, a la the last supper, drinking of our her lord’s blood to absolve herself of sin? and, if so, what significance that jamie lynn drinks WHITE? is this a reference to jamie lynn’s recent marriage? is britney warning her younger sibling about the perils and compromises of marriage, and painting herself as a red (scarlet) woman? is britney suggesting that the two sisters are each mirror images of the other or, IF YOU WILL, either end of the same hour glass (OF WINE). certainly, such a reading is in keeping with the contrast between britney’s ‘I loved so much that I cried’ and jamie lynn’s ‘I sang so loud that I smiled’, ABOUT WHICH I NEED SAY NO MORE.

or, like, how, due to the fact that this is a duet between sisters, we would ASSUME that the titular YOU refers, indexically, to each of them, AND YET, britney chooses to open the song with a triple invocation of the same, her blank tone, almost, i’ll say it, accusatory. could the YOU, in fact, BE YOU AND I (ALSO A YOU?) and as for ‘chillin’, well, i suppose that this could just be a reference to the white wine that jamie lynn imbibes throughout…perhaps we’re being instructed to be servants, slaves, (viz. I’M A SLAVE 4U???) to a new pop sensation…but what if, instead, britney is referring to her haters (me, us, YOU) THROWING SHADE ALL OVER HER. what if she, in fact, views her life now as nothing more than the process of navigating these shadows? CHILLIN’ stuff indeed. truly CHILLIN’ (like a villain????)

—————————————————————————————————–

Buy Chillin’ With You

Read it: http://theneweryork.com/review-chillin-britney-spears-ft-jamie-lynn-spears-stephen-otoole/
New Fiction: Outside by Adam Dalva 

I could go outside today and then I would be outside it would be that easy I would put on my shoes and go outside and then I would be outside but one time when I put on my shoes and got my bicycle and went outside I went on a bicycle ride in the Gowanus Canal I really did this no no not in the Gowanus Canal but I told a man once that I went on a bicycle ride in the Gowanus Canal and he asked if I was swimming when I did it and I said no I only swim from ropes that hang from my ceiling so I can learn better for when I am outside and he said that I was an idiot which is true because I said in the Gowanus Canal when it wasn’t a bicycle ride in the Gowanus Canal it was a bicycle ride around the Gowanus Canal in Gowanus but not in the Canal but it’s too late because I ruined my brain it was perfect once it was perfect when I got it but I ruined it when I went outside and so I can’t go on a bicycle ride in Gowanus because of this and the next time I went on a bicycle ride it was through Park Slope riding up and down the hills and exercising outside I really did this but then there was a man who followed me I’m sure that when I was outside in Park Slope the man on the bicycle followed me because I turned left once and he was still behind me and that was fine and I turned left again and he was still behind me and that was worrying but acceptable but then I turned left again a third time in a loop that you would only make if you weren’t going anywhere if you were just trying to enjoy a bicycle ride outside for exercise like I was and I looked after I turned again and he was still there so I rode down the slope back to my house and locked the door and did the remainder of my outside exercising with inside swimming and checked outside every five minutes and finally got into bed and stayed there and forgot to brush my teeth and ruined them I ruined my teeth they were perfect once they were perfect when I got them but I ruined them when I went outside and so I don’t go on bicycle rides anywhere outside and I don’t swim outside either because I’m not quite there yet but I could go on a walk outside instead today and not walk in the Gowanus canal and not walk near any men and I not walk near water but I could still walk outside even though planes crash sometimes and there are cars and that man could turn the corner any minute but I could still go outside and walk back and forth on the square of sidewalk outside my apartment two steps at a time even though everything that’s ever happened when I go outside could happen again but that’s okay because I’m ready for the planes and cars and men and water that come but if I walked outside everyone at their windows would see my body and teeth how I ruined them by riding my bicycle outside in Gowanus and in Park Slope and by eating outside and by walking outside and by swimming outside one time a long time ago so I’m not going to go outside at all and see I ruined this story it was perfect once it was perfect when I got it



Read it: http://theneweryork.com/outside-adam-dalva/ High-res

New Fiction: Outside by Adam Dalva

I could go outside today and then I would be outside it would be that easy I would put on my shoes and go outside and then I would be outside but one time when I put on my shoes and got my bicycle and went outside I went on a bicycle ride in the Gowanus Canal I really did this no no not in the Gowanus Canal but I told a man once that I went on a bicycle ride in the Gowanus Canal and he asked if I was swimming when I did it and I said no I only swim from ropes that hang from my ceiling so I can learn better for when I am outside and he said that I was an idiot which is true because I said in the Gowanus Canal when it wasn’t a bicycle ride in the Gowanus Canal it was a bicycle ride around the Gowanus Canal in Gowanus but not in the Canal but it’s too late because I ruined my brain it was perfect once it was perfect when I got it but I ruined it when I went outside and so I can’t go on a bicycle ride in Gowanus because of this and the next time I went on a bicycle ride it was through Park Slope riding up and down the hills and exercising outside I really did this but then there was a man who followed me I’m sure that when I was outside in Park Slope the man on the bicycle followed me because I turned left once and he was still behind me and that was fine and I turned left again and he was still behind me and that was worrying but acceptable but then I turned left again a third time in a loop that you would only make if you weren’t going anywhere if you were just trying to enjoy a bicycle ride outside for exercise like I was and I looked after I turned again and he was still there so I rode down the slope back to my house and locked the door and did the remainder of my outside exercising with inside swimming and checked outside every five minutes and finally got into bed and stayed there and forgot to brush my teeth and ruined them I ruined my teeth they were perfect once they were perfect when I got them but I ruined them when I went outside and so I don’t go on bicycle rides anywhere outside and I don’t swim outside either because I’m not quite there yet but I could go on a walk outside instead today and not walk in the Gowanus canal and not walk near any men and I not walk near water but I could still walk outside even though planes crash sometimes and there are cars and that man could turn the corner any minute but I could still go outside and walk back and forth on the square of sidewalk outside my apartment two steps at a time even though everything that’s ever happened when I go outside could happen again but that’s okay because I’m ready for the planes and cars and men and water that come but if I walked outside everyone at their windows would see my body and teeth how I ruined them by riding my bicycle outside in Gowanus and in Park Slope and by eating outside and by walking outside and by swimming outside one time a long time ago so I’m not going to go outside at all and see I ruined this story it was perfect once it was perfect when I got it

Read it: http://theneweryork.com/outside-adam-dalva/
New Fiction: Ennui (Consumerism in Iambic Pentameter) by Isaac Birchmier 

Forty percent off swim gear at the Brand
New J.C. PENNY® sale only at BEST
BUY® one get one for half price at TARGET®,
Your friendly source for household appliances.
Tents, coatracks, dishes, and silverware.
CHEEZ-ITS®, DUM-DUMS®, CHEX MIX®, and OREO®s
All twenty-five percent off At HASTING’S®:
Movies and Video Games—Electronics—
For the low low price of 2 for 1 sale!
With the ownership of a nice brand new
PONTIAC® G8 and WALMART®
Beating out the competition with
What you want is Bags of petunia seeds
Only $4.99 right here at the
New and remodeled botanical
Gardens of HERSHEY’S® and KRAFT® Cheeze Whiz®,
RITZ® crackers and VELVEETA®; HUGGIES® for
The baby in all of us: PAMPERS®.
FEBREZE® air freshener to clean right up
Those hard to reach places that SWIFFER® the
Quicker picker-upper® cleans like Yes
DAWN® dish soap kills ninety nine point nine nine
Percent of the leading brands are not the
Bacterial disinfectants help to
Lose that weight instantly with none other
Than INSTA-SLIM®, or if you prefer
VICTORIA’S SECRET® nylons and new
Garments for the whole family starting
At the low low price low price Ninety point
Ninety price nine nine low nine price nine—


Read it: http://theneweryork.com/ennui-isaac-birchmier/ High-res

New Fiction: Ennui (Consumerism in Iambic Pentameter) by Isaac Birchmier

Forty percent off swim gear at the Brand
New J.C. PENNY® sale only at BEST
BUY® one get one for half price at TARGET®,
Your friendly source for household appliances.
Tents, coatracks, dishes, and silverware.
CHEEZ-ITS®, DUM-DUMS®, CHEX MIX®, and OREO®s
All twenty-five percent off At HASTING’S®:
Movies and Video Games—Electronics—
For the low low price of 2 for 1 sale!
With the ownership of a nice brand new
PONTIAC® G8 and WALMART®
Beating out the competition with
What you want is Bags of petunia seeds
Only $4.99 right here at the
New and remodeled botanical
Gardens of HERSHEY’S® and KRAFT® Cheeze Whiz®,
RITZ® crackers and VELVEETA®; HUGGIES® for
The baby in all of us: PAMPERS®.
FEBREZE® air freshener to clean right up
Those hard to reach places that SWIFFER® the
Quicker picker-upper® cleans like Yes
DAWN® dish soap kills ninety nine point nine nine
Percent of the leading brands are not the
Bacterial disinfectants help to
Lose that weight instantly with none other
Than INSTA-SLIM®, or if you prefer
VICTORIA’S SECRET® nylons and new
Garments for the whole family starting
At the low low price low price Ninety point
Ninety price nine nine low nine price nine—

Read it: http://theneweryork.com/ennui-isaac-birchmier/

Nine Tales

@9TalesJournal is looking for stories with the theme of Korea!

Nine Tales is an online literary journal that focuses on Korea and all its facets. In each issue we publish nine tales. We welcome engaging stories and essays which challenge the reader, but when preparing your submission please consider the Kumiho. Kumiho, the demonic nine tailed fox, is a seductive creature that entices the unwary, travellers, scholars, or similar, with the lure of its illusory…

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New post from theNewerYork Dispatch: How to Trick theNewerYork into Accepting Your Submission: Elements of Experimental Literature or What We Mean When We Say We Want It Weird 


LANGUAGE and CONTENT

This one may seem obvious, but the most natural way to experiment with writing is to use unusual words, sentences, and ideas. This is also the most difficult to explain. Consider interesting juxtapositions: the banal and the holy, sexuality and landscapes, space travel and…

Read the rest: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/how-to-trick-theneweryork-into-accepting-your-submission-elements-of-experimental-literature-or-what-we-mean-when-we-say-we-want-it-weird/

New post from theNewerYork Dispatch: How to Trick theNewerYork into Accepting Your Submission: Elements of Experimental Literature or What We Mean When We Say We Want It Weird

LANGUAGE and CONTENT This one may seem obvious, but the most natural way to experiment with writing is to use unusual words, sentences, and ideas. This is also the most difficult to explain. Consider interesting juxtapositions: the banal and the holy, sexuality and landscapes, space travel and…

Read the rest: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/how-to-trick-theneweryork-into-accepting-your-submission-elements-of-experimental-literature-or-what-we-mean-when-we-say-we-want-it-weird/
New Fiction: We have started to make movies by Joshua 


From the start, our plan for theNewerYork has been to show the world how much potential lurks in every story stuck in static pixels and ink. We want to explode your stories: we want to design them as posters, we want to turn them into films, animations, songs, works of art. These are not adaptations, these are metamorphoses – every word in the posters, every word in the film, in the songs, will be exactly as written. We have published over 900 stories in under 3 years. We want to transform every single one. Adapting literature into other art forms isn’t new, but it’s usually done by third parties. We want to oversee the process, we want to get feedback from our authors, we want to bring the stories to new life and new crowds. This initiative will be paired with our goal to pay you all handsomely for any sales or profit.
Nothing will ever beat the unbelievable experience of sitting in a chair and reading silently. I know this, but if theNewerYork is going to publish daring work and experiment within the world of literature, to fail to employ our network of artists and the technological tools at our command would make us idiots.
I’m also excited about our endeavor because at the core of theNewerYork is the mission to be kind to artists and their work. We will profit share any merchandise or film sales with our writers. In an ideal world, our writers would write, submit, and then sit back as paychecks come in. This is already happening on a small scale with the donation buttons on every story on our website.
So here it is, the first story we have run through the machine: “Depressed Obama” written by August Smith, originally published here on theNewerYork.com.
Let us know which one you want to see next,
Josh
1st: a poster, printed sustainably in Los Angeles. Click here to buy or learn more. 

 
2nd: Depressed Obama will be performed live at several events in the coming weeks.

Find an event near you.

3rd: A totally awesome animated version created and narrated by Matt Kresling.



Read it: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/started-make-movies/ High-res

New Fiction: We have started to make movies by Joshua

From the start, our plan for theNewerYork has been to show the world how much potential lurks in every story stuck in static pixels and ink. We want to explode your stories: we want to design them as posters, we want to turn them into films, animations, songs, works of art. These are not adaptations, these are metamorphoses – every word in the posters, every word in the film, in the songs, will be exactly as written. We have published over 900 stories in under 3 years. We want to transform every single one. Adapting literature into other art forms isn’t new, but it’s usually done by third parties. We want to oversee the process, we want to get feedback from our authors, we want to bring the stories to new life and new crowds. This initiative will be paired with our goal to pay you all handsomely for any sales or profit.

Nothing will ever beat the unbelievable experience of sitting in a chair and reading silently. I know this, but if theNewerYork is going to publish daring work and experiment within the world of literature, to fail to employ our network of artists and the technological tools at our command would make us idiots.

I’m also excited about our endeavor because at the core of theNewerYork is the mission to be kind to artists and their work. We will profit share any merchandise or film sales with our writers. In an ideal world, our writers would write, submit, and then sit back as paychecks come in. This is already happening on a small scale with the donation buttons on every story on our website.

So here it is, the first story we have run through the machine: “Depressed Obama” written by August Smith, originally published here on theNewerYork.com.

Let us know which one you want to see next,

Josh

1st: a poster, printed sustainably in Los Angeles. Click here to buy or learn more. image

 

2nd: Depressed Obama will be performed live at several events in the coming weeks.

Find an event near you.

3rd: A totally awesome animated version created and narrated by Matt Kresling.

Read it: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/started-make-movies/
New Fiction: A Short Visual History of theNewerYork by Joshua 

Editor’s Note: The entire NewerYork Metropolitan area is in a tizzy about the upcoming madhouse displays in their midst, so we decided to reach far into the Town Records for a series of intriguing photos/videos from theNewerYork’s past.
2011: The First Kickstarter
 
2012: Book II & The First-Ever Literary Carnival


2013: The Craziest Year Yet

2014: ?




Read it: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/short-visual-history-theneweryork/ High-res

New Fiction: A Short Visual History of theNewerYork by Joshua

Editor’s Note: The entire NewerYork Metropolitan area is in a tizzy about the upcoming madhouse displays in their midst, so we decided to reach far into the Town Records for a series of intriguing photos/videos from theNewerYork’s past.

2011: The First Kickstarter

2012: Book II & The First-Ever Literary Carnival

2013: The Craziest Year Yet

image

2014: ?

image

Read it: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/short-visual-history-theneweryork/
New Fiction: theNewerYork Town Charter #1 by Joshua 

Editor’s Note: Welcome to the newest news source in theNewerYork, theNewerYork Dispatch. We promise to bring you the slowest, least accurate news from the rapidly-forming metro area known as theNewerYork.
Today theNewerYork made history by drafting and signing a town charter in under six seconds. We have reproduced it in full here.
TOWN CHARTER OF THE DISTRICT OF IRREVERENCE, THENEWERYORK

Approved:  May 2, 2014 12:00:01
Effective:   May 2, 2014 12:00:04
IN ORDER TO promote experimentation with words all over the world pursuant with the laws of irreverence, theNewerYork adopts the following charter…
CHAPTER !, SECTION ***, RESIDENTS AND CITIZENS
All the inhabitants of dwelling within the thought-space between the back of the left ear and the mastoid process shall now constitute the body literatic named theNewerYork.
All of those who name themselves citizens of theNewerYork will be given all the powers and privileges of citizenship, including:
Wizardry
24-hour-a-day-all-you-can-eat experimental buffet
A deluge of riches that can’t be spent
Ideas, inspiration, stories, and artifacts beamed directly to personal picture windows
One (1) lifetime supply of happiness
Two (2) lifetime supplies of misery
A permanent bump in fictional social status
Access to bath houses (after signing additional waiver)
Increased sensitivity to drugs and emotions
The ability to talk to dogs
Further information on obtaining citizenship (and all applicable forms and documents) can be found in Appendix (.

CHAPTER !, SECTION “”, INJUNCTIONS
WE BANISH all traditions, short stories, stanzas, poems, paragraphs, novels, and other known literary forms from the city limits of theNewerYork.
WE MANDATE that all official literary artifacts found within our digital sphere shall be LESS THAN, EQUAL TO, OR TOO WEIRD TO BE CONFINED TO language.
WE DECLARE a municipal partnership with all those who are attracted to bizarre, odd, weird, new, and unstable literary forms.
WE ENCOURAGE partnership between words and images, whether they like each other or not.
WE PROMISE to disappoint at least one resident of theNewerYork.
WE ABOLISH genre.
WE DECREE that all shall get weird with words. Whenever.
CHAPTER !, SECTION +, EFFECTIVE DATE
This charter shall take effect on May 2nd, 2014, and all clauses shall be retroactively applied to all previous dates, persons, places, things, and ideas.



Read it: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/theneweryork-town-charter-1/ High-res

New Fiction: theNewerYork Town Charter #1 by Joshua

Editor’s Note: Welcome to the newest news source in theNewerYork, theNewerYork Dispatch. We promise to bring you the slowest, least accurate news from the rapidly-forming metro area known as theNewerYork.

Today theNewerYork made history by drafting and signing a town charter in under six seconds. We have reproduced it in full here.

TOWN CHARTER OF THE DISTRICT OF IRREVERENCE, THENEWERYORK

image

Approved:  May 2, 2014 12:00:01

Effective:   May 2, 2014 12:00:04

IN ORDER TO promote experimentation with words all over the world pursuant with the laws of irreverence, theNewerYork adopts the following charter…

CHAPTER !, SECTION ***, RESIDENTS AND CITIZENS

All the inhabitants of dwelling within the thought-space between the back of the left ear and the mastoid process shall now constitute the body literatic named theNewerYork.

All of those who name themselves citizens of theNewerYork will be given all the powers and privileges of citizenship, including:

  • Wizardry
  • 24-hour-a-day-all-you-can-eat experimental buffet
  • A deluge of riches that can’t be spent
  • Ideas, inspiration, stories, and artifacts beamed directly to personal picture windows
  • One (1) lifetime supply of happiness
  • Two (2) lifetime supplies of misery
  • A permanent bump in fictional social status
  • Access to bath houses (after signing additional waiver)
  • Increased sensitivity to drugs and emotions
  • The ability to talk to dogs

Further information on obtaining citizenship (and all applicable forms and documents) can be found in Appendix (.

CHAPTER !, SECTION “”, INJUNCTIONS

WE BANISH all traditions, short stories, stanzas, poems, paragraphs, novels, and other known literary forms from the city limits of theNewerYork.

WE MANDATE that all official literary artifacts found within our digital sphere shall be LESS THAN, EQUAL TO, OR TOO WEIRD TO BE CONFINED TO language.

WE DECLARE a municipal partnership with all those who are attracted to bizarre, odd, weird, new, and unstable literary forms.

WE ENCOURAGE partnership between words and images, whether they like each other or not.

WE PROMISE to disappoint at least one resident of theNewerYork.

WE ABOLISH genre.

WE DECREE that all shall get weird with words. Whenever.

CHAPTER !, SECTION +, EFFECTIVE DATE

This charter shall take effect on May 2nd, 2014, and all clauses shall be retroactively applied to all previous dates, persons, places, things, and ideas.

image

Read it: http://theneweryork.com/dispatch/theneweryork-town-charter-1/

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